Down The Rabbit Hole

So I haven't written anything new in a while.
The truth is I had nothing good to say.
I fell in deep in to a rabbit hole. The rabbit hole of the darkness of my mind.
I do that sometimes. I get lost in there and I can't find my way back.
I can see how easily I let situations eat me up. I can see my soul shatter and my heart crumble and my body perish.
I can see how I let loneliness get the best of me. But still I let the fall down the rabbit's hole take its course.
I don't even try to hold on to anything anymore.I just fall and fall and maybe cry.

So apparently living in  the Capital of Texas does not mean my maniacal depressions are cured. I must say I think they have gotten worst. I mean I am not doing anything crazy like cutting or running straight in to a Longhorn but I am definitely going back in to the hole.

I can't really blame Austin. I have always been this way, But I can hold Austin partially responsible.
After all I have been living in this place for a several months now and still the only place in this city that feels even remotely like home is my house.

I mean don't take this the wrong way I love the Austin building, it's gardens, the parks everything. But unfortunately nothing feels like home, yet.

Except my house.

Would I die if I lost that to???

No.

Probably just take a deeper trip in to the rabbit hole